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Total War Heaven » Forums » Rome: Total War Discussion » Rome: Total War Heaven - 404 Messages
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Topic Subject:Rome: Total War Heaven - 404 Messages
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yakcamkir
Seraph Emeritus
posted 15 June 2008 09:52 EDT (US)         
I've recently implemented a variable 404 message on RTWH. You should be able to see some of the variations by reloading this link several times.

http://rtw.heavengames.com/nonexistentpage

What we're looking for is some good messages to add to the list we have so far. Post your ideas in this thread and if we like them and they are suitable, then we'll implement them.

Our current messages are:
'As Augustus once said: "Server- give me back my site pages!"',
'The page you are looking for cannot be found. The Carthaginians have sacrificed it to Baal.',
'This page has been trampled by an elephant. It probably won't be dug out of the ground any time soon.',
'The page you are looking for is now held by Huns.',
'This page was involved in the civil revolt in Corduba, and as such, has been executed by your men!',
'This page has been whisked away by the Amazons, to an unknown fate.....',
'This page has been taken by the Brutii during the Roman Civil War.',
'Senate Mission: Find this page.

Reward: This page.',
'This page has been eaten by a Yubtseb Elephant.',
'This page has been bribed and now belongs to another faction.',
'This page has been felled by an assassin's blade.',
'This page has been lost in Germania. We suspect it has been sacrificed.',
'This page has decided to become a Vestal Virgin.',
'This page is currently doing military service. Please check back in a few years.',
'This page is with Legio II in Britannia. Don't expect it back.',
'This page is currently under siege.',
'There is nothing that remains of this page. It has been sacked, and the ruins are held by steppe tribes.',
'This page is routing, and oblivious to the world.'

Please note the following rules:
1. All submissions must comply with the CoC.
2. All submissions must relate to the game or the era covered by RTW.
3. No inside jokes or references to forumers.

Good luck and get your thinking caps on!


Rome: Total War Heaven | Medieval II: Total War Heaven | Empire: Total War Heaven
"Do not stand behind Satan in the Post Office queue because the devil takes many forms."
"Your front-page picture of Kate Winslet with a plunging neckline being up for two golden globes was most appropriate."

Unpublished letters to the Daily Telegraph

[This message has been edited by yakcamkir (edited 06-16-2008 @ 06:11 PM).]

AuthorReplies:
bigbird175
Legionary
posted 18 June 2008 21:45 EDT (US)     26 / 43       
"This page was crusified by the romans along with 5,000 others"
Gallowglass
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 11:29 EDT (US)     27 / 43       
'Hannibal knew how to use this page, but not how to find it'

------m------m------
(o o)
(~)

Monkey beats bunny. Please put Monkey in your signature to prevent the rise of bunny.
m0n|<3yz r 2 pwn n00b
Andalus
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 11:45 EDT (US)     28 / 43       
It is a sweet and beautiful thing for a page to die for its website.


This page has had the temerity to revolt against Roman rule! It has been justly punished.

(Or something like that - I can't quite remember the wording for civil revolt)
Gallowglass
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 12:11 EDT (US)     29 / 43       
'This page attempted a Parthian Shot. It failed'

'Victory loves prudence. But this page was on her hit list...'

'This page didn't realise that partying with Dionysus wasn't the safest of ideas...'

------m------m------
(o o)
(~)

Monkey beats bunny. Please put Monkey in your signature to prevent the rise of bunny.
m0n|<3yz r 2 pwn n00b

[This message has been edited by gallowglass (edited 06-19-2008 @ 12:13 PM).]

Oolon Colluphid
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 12:32 EDT (US)     30 / 43       
This page can hide anywhere. Which is a bit of a problem.
Shit, that was more or less the direction I was going with.

"Page's abilities at glance:
Can hide in long load times.
Expert at hiding in your browser."

or...

"The plague has broken out in this page, it has been quarantined."

"The population of this page revolted, you'll have to recapture it from rebel content in order to see it."

"The people of this site rioted, this page has been damaged."

"You have not yet discovered this page. Try and get site information from other online factions.

"The enemy page routed and will trouble us no more."

"Your connection was killed trying to fulfill his mission"

I feel I should be able to come up with better ones, but this will do for now.

[This message has been edited by Oolon Colluphid (edited 06-19-2008 @ 04:46 PM).]

Gallowglass
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 13:26 EDT (US)     31 / 43       

'This page assumed spending time with a people who loved their horses would be a good idea. It was sadly mistaken.'

'This page made the mistake of calling Mars after his Greek counterpart, and was thus dispatched'

'Sudden clarity! Apnoba isn't, after all, a soft touch, and her worshippers do practice page sacrifice...'

'The omens from this page's liver are unclear. But this page won't be returning any time soon...'

------m------m------
(o o)
(~)

Monkey beats bunny. Please put Monkey in your signature to prevent the rise of bunny.
m0n|<3yz r 2 pwn n00b
God of bears
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 13:50 EDT (US)     32 / 43       
"This page has gone to meet the ancestors let it trouble us no more"

"do you want to attack a neutral page?"

*sigh* why did mother make me do this? anyway, today we fight those greeks! - a general in my Scipio game
If salvation is what they want, I have an axe, they have a head, and I temple built from skulls looking to grow. - subRosa
CaesarVincens
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 14:12 EDT (US)     33 / 43       
'It is a bad page that cannot be found.'
-Publilius Syrus

'A bad page is even worse than a missing one'
-Tacitus

Veni, Vidi, well... you know.

Extended Cultures, A modification of RTW.

Si hoc legere posses, Latinam linguam scis.
ɪf ju kŠn ɹid ­ɪs, ju noʊ liŋgwɪstɪks.
Godfried Van B
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 15:06 EDT (US)     34 / 43       
haha, there are some really good ones in here!! ^^ ^^
Isn't it "It is the noblest and safest thing to be visibly animated by one spirit"?
ya i know, but then it wouldn't be right anyomore
oh well, feel free to edit!

"This page takes 2 turns to recruit/construct"

"something about the princess that can be 'stolen' in m2tw maybe.. unless you really want rtw stuff?"

"this page is trying to enter a siege tower, but can't"

this one sucks pretty hard ^^ just to laugh with rtw bugs

one land,one king
Gallowglass
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 15:19 EDT (US)     35 / 43       

'This page has a habit of asking Parthian kings how their names are spelt. Unfortunately, some of them took it as an insult...'

'This page is currently being used as a shield in a phalanx.'

'We do not ask how many, but where exactly this page is...'

'Someone should have told this page that before it tried to join the druidic cult...'

'A collision at sea ruined this entire page.'

'This page was sponsored to walk the length of the steppes. By now it must much prefer to ride...'

'As of today's ritual sacrifice, this page can no longer assume the Morrigan is male.'

'Following Hannibal into the Alps wasn't this page's best move...'

------m------m------
(o o)
(~)

Monkey beats bunny. Please put Monkey in your signature to prevent the rise of bunny.
m0n|<3yz r 2 pwn n00b
Oolon Colluphid
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 15:58 EDT (US)     36 / 43       
'This page is in skirmish mode.'

!!! Finally thought of one I really like myself. Hope someone else didn't allready mention something similar.

Anyway, there are some really, really clever ones here. I salute you all.

oh and let me just say:
'This page found itself on the wrong side of a battle'

'Et tu, webpage'

'Veni, non vidi, wtf?' (I could've make this one better had I paid attention in Latin class.)

'Historical Event

Today this page was destroyed by a 404 error'
Gallowglass
Legionary
posted 19 June 2008 16:18 EDT (US)     37 / 43       

'An important lesson in this page's life: don't stand between two phalanxes.'

'This page has been crushed trying to wear Saka regalia.'

------m------m------
(o o)
(~)

Monkey beats bunny. Please put Monkey in your signature to prevent the rise of bunny.
m0n|<3yz r 2 pwn n00b
Tzar469
Legionary
posted 20 June 2008 02:13 EDT (US)     38 / 43       
This page can only sally out once per turn.
Hussarknight
Seraph Emeritus
posted 20 June 2008 03:04 EDT (US)     39 / 43       
"Go and tell the Spartans,
Stranger passing by,
That here, disobedient to their laws, this page doesn't lie."

          Hussarknight
Gallowglass
Legionary
posted 21 June 2008 06:37 EDT (US)     40 / 43       
'This page lived a short life of glory rather than a long one of obscurity. Either way, it's gone.'

------m------m------
(o o)
(~)

Monkey beats bunny. Please put Monkey in your signature to prevent the rise of bunny.
m0n|<3yz r 2 pwn n00b
EnemyofJupitor
HG Alumnus Superbus
posted 21 June 2008 07:43 EDT (US)     41 / 43       
'Veni, non vidi, wtf?'
Not sure we'd like a page that said 'What the ****?' on the site
However, a twisting of 'Veni, Vidi, Vici' would work (perhaps Latin for 'I came, I didn't see, I left' with the English translation underneath).

And I shall go Softly into the Night Taking my Dreams As will You
Boetje
Legionary
posted 21 June 2008 08:09 EDT (US)     42 / 43       
veni, non vidi, abii

Yep, it's true, having no sig is boring. But so is this one. Which makes my point... relatively pointless.
Can a point be a point when it is pointless?

[This message has been edited by Boetje (edited 06-21-2008 @ 08:10 AM).]

Oolon Colluphid
Legionary
posted 21 June 2008 09:19 EDT (US)     43 / 43       
Not sure we'd like a page that said 'What the ****?' on the site
I know that's why I used the instant message style acronym.


'This page has gone beserk and is chasing lesser pages.'
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